moodswingemo

I feel moodswing emo.
A sudden inexplicable moodswing because I guess its everything stuffed in me and I didnt release them slowly, dumbgirl. Just keep putting it in and in and in.
Its after lesson today at 6. I had to wait till 7.30 for CCA event, and there was too much time.
I. I.... I stood on the downward stairs unsure of where to go for 10 seconds! GOSH! I really stood rooted on the steps and thought. Hard.
and then I turned back and strolled @ 1/10 of my usual pace.. to YIH. I wished the trip was longer though, so that I could stare at the ports along the way, they look upon the sea wide and vast. after-rain breeze streaming through my hair.
I thought of my desire to escape to SEP, sooner, quicker. Put everything behind. Selfish desires, but a longing desire.
I feel that I might cry. Its just that when i feel stressed, over everything, or nothing at all, remember the times when I'd just cry? No you dont. click on my past past past blogposts and you'll see... haha . Crying seems like my remedy. But in school I wont. I feel like I need a hug.
Its the times when I feel like I wanna walk on and on and on and on, dont wanna stop.
But. 어 디? Where?
Im very glad today is Thursday, my last day of the week. Things have been trivial, but somehow since 2 days ago when I woke up, something was wrong and I had a grudge with the week... nothing was perfect to me anymore since then.

Are you lost wandering, AY.STARSPLASH?

bigbang - haru haru.
Im glad of my earphones, to plug in after school, cos it masked the jealous glances of passersby on me along my slow stroll towards YIH (at the unusual girl enjoying music with wind blowing in her hair, walking at a pace so slow that nothing else seemed to matter in the world?) . i pretended everything, everyone was invisible. I created my own world. to give myself time, to stop and. just stop.
still have the urge to tear. But WHY? I dont know.