HAPPY BIRTHDAY AY.STARSPLASH
today was the first ever memorable birthday i have spent with MUM!!!!!!!!!!! we had a hearty meal after my First Aid course! =) because dad is away in china, i spent my birthday with mum!
mum enquired why my friends have not dated me out for my birthday... but its after exams and next week then go... i know dear friends never forget my birthday... they who bother to send me a text message though miles and galacticas away... even though i have forgotten theirs... which i failed to accomplish.. =( yet the night was peaceful...



its me, its just me
fantasizing evrything unreal
drawing the night sky
trying to brave my fears



AY.STARSPLASH has a new hobby!!!! >>>
to collect names. yes. names
1. YANG GUANYI!!! my dear husband!!! he's 2 minutes early!
2. BELOVED SNOOPY!!!! LI QINGYUN!!!!! she's forever ON THE DOT like she was 1 year agao on 12/6/07 - 12.00am!!!! =) thanks! 2013, here we go!=)
3. CARLINE LIM LI YAN!!! my twin!!!!!! my closest twin ever! who shared silent conversations with me! =) Love ya!
4.LOUISA KOH FEI YUAN!!!! my best listener and counsellor whenever i'm in whatever deep pitch in school... i miss you loads. MANY ATIMES RECENTLY I WANNA LOOK FOR YOU FOR GUIDANCE, but you aint near... =( i realised its time i grew up and MATURE and think for myslef. Which i havent done.
5. Yuen WEILING!!!!! dear heh-heh!!! haha... she's galactica miles away but she rememebrs me!!! we promised to meet 1 starry starry fine day!!!! WE WILL!
6. KHIEW KIAN LAM!!!!! my best friend in amkss... just taht we are still so good friends for 5 years, its drifting now... =) he called me at 00.28... so 'late!!!!!!' haha , but nontheless, i said thank you! haha
7.SLC eileen!!!!!! my new friend... my good friend in service learning comm... =)
8. from 96305341 : can somebody tell me whose number this is? i asked but she didnt reply who she was... =(... i think its a guide, maybe koonling? XD
9. GODDESS AURI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i simply love her starry black notebook and lovely note!!!! omg! the bk is so black, so glittery so starry, for me to divulge my dark emo secrets... haha.... thanks goddess.
10. 92456011 - guess WHO!!!!! YEO XUN HAO< class chairman of 4/5 0'70'8!!! omg!!!! he rememebred my birthday!!! omg!!!! weiling must ahve told him! haha, jk la... both of them sat in fronta me in 4/5... touched!!!! he's so distant from all of us...
11. jiajin.
12. Red cross xinhui!!!! my new friend too. my closest friend from redcross, even gave me a present though we barely know each other... i'm touched! =)
13. michelle from 0802! my classmate!!! she's a retainee, and these jiejies, never faile to enlighten me in my work and i must rememebr to wish her on 22nd june!
14. Randy bro!!!! on msn!
15.jojo - JOANNE from GIRLGUIDES!!! my junior!!! remmebered!!!! =) hisbiscuits, auri that's what they call it now... haha
16.eileen 0802 my classmate who cares. =)
17.STEFFI HUANG! my best friend in primary school. omg! she rememebred. i'm guilty. so remorseful...
18. WENYUAN!!!! my 4 years classmate from 2/5 0'50'6 and 4/5 0'70'8! =) thanks!
19. Chia renjie! i thought since dad was in china he wouldnt send and i wont be able to see it on dad's phone... but he emailed me! haha=)
20. cheryl low!!! love you!!!!




its me, its just me
who lied, who instigated the fights
who believed too strongly - who i was.



Are you happy now? Really?


MY CONFESSIONS LIST 2008 11/6/08 (which i fantasized onboard the bus ride home! haha)
- i told a lie. a small lie. which i sorta revealed.
- i failed to surprise mum by buying her a bottle of her favourite kaya... =(
- i did feel pathetic on the 10th thinking of my bday...
- i never did blame qingyun for not being able to make it today due to her mum... i know what her mum's like...
- oh, i expected things from u...
- i'm worried about exams. but i shant study this week.
- i'm reminded of what eileen told me - that her bf pushes her to study. well, i motivate myself! =)
- i cant wait to draw out my list of names...
- i will await the witching hour on 12th june, and the closing hour at 12.00am on 13th june...
- i finally felt a tad of pride being in RCHN, learning first aid and CPR, and
- planned the gathering time, and wearing of similar shirts to bond the cca... its a little step, that i have accomplished. i will rememebr what i said. and i'm happy!
- omg!!!! i cant wait to open auri's present and all the red packets!!! =)



i dont know. if i will regret. but i felt this way before when i ended everything 1 yr back. terrible feeling. but it went away after awhile, and we are both happy now. its that i didnt bother ... just me. well, i dazed and stoned for awhile, and my mind drifted away. i needed time to adjust. because. it has become a norm. that i neglect and take for granted. that it is thus different without so. till it becomes all too routine for me, it becomes sad. like something is dislodged from the jigsaw ... i'm feeling the 'upside down' feeling. 75 days and above. when we havent talked like this...
but its nice tonight. =)



26th after econs test go amk hub for dinner and gathering k!!!! omg!! 26th! faster come! and wish randy bro happy birthday!
my camp ends on 15th!!! from 14th to 15th, and i'll start studying! haha!!
I CAN DO IT!!!!



at the crossroads - i chose the uncluttered path
with rambles and shrubs
that grew too accustomed -
to my heart.



i had a simple and satisfying birthday today, knowing who, did care.
whatever else, time will sort them out and patch up the gaps.
=)
its my birthday, and i promised not to emo or cry.
i almost, but i wont, after all. =)
ay.starsplash. till then.
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Are you happy now? Really?