All because of vanity.

oh well, Vanity injured my eye.... ranodm but, but the price label slipped past my eye while i was hurriedly trying on the clothes...

MOE interview is over! It was such Great feat for me, I've tried my best, no regrets, for it was my first time and there is always a 1st time :) I hold my Guides motto true: 'Be Prepared'. for good or bad, then i wont ever be too crestfallen or over the moon... it was worthy experience, and i'll see how it goes;
If I get it, i'll treat all of you to a small humble token.

Its a hobby tracking people on facebook... like Oh man, whassup! haha... there i keep up with the whereabouts of old friends, to forge new & stronger bonds. The triumph when i unearth the little secrets of people ... Its intriguing! and its an avenue to discover peoples' characters.

On-going crazy sale at cotton on has tarnished its style completely. But that's where vanity set in i injured my eye.

oh, i eneded the interview with "thank you, have a nice day!".
haha. census language has gotten into me....

ay.

But you know, somehow, i still love the rest of you all so much.
We are so GREAT, together :)

Yes, and I learnt to
'follow where the wind blows'.

and so, It has come true yea?.

YESTERDAY.
feels like everything's simply too repetitive, and i ought to go out there, take the opportunity to see the other places of singapore, outside of Singtel, in the vicinity of my humble neighbourhood.

I've got the urge to just explore new palces of Singapore. I need the bustle. Mum dreads bustle, but i love it, makes me feel alive, to move along with the crowd. But, its difficult trying to remain sane and empathetic in places like raffles place, where people get so caught up in work, they become really Heartless.

I must confess
There's too much brewing animosities in the office. You call this office politics? It seems childish, why are we grown ups caught in these mish-mesh of animosities then?i really dont take sides. but then, tell me, what's good or bad. Tell me who's right or wrong? and you tell me that that clique werent Right to mix around with.. omg. They are my friends!!!
If its true, then
What I deem, is virtuously right??

Its so ironic. I desire attention. Times im lonely and pms-ing... then i want to speak everything on my blog, and make you read my blog to know how YOu make me feel, but somehow, im afraid you would come to my blog to learn how your actions have hurt me and made me dislike you. No, i wont stay here, just to accompnay you, and you dont criticise, because it was out of goodwill that i brought all the stuffs from home to share. That was an utter insult. and i know our speech exchanges shoot silent pins. Dont, make me turn nasty. you dont need to know what's going on with me.

But sometimes i feel so silly with stuffs that i blurt out without thinking, makes me so Dumb like a fool.

I wonder
how people with different perceptions can really jive together in society. Recently out gallivanting, Ive witnessed many ugly sides of people. and over the phone, the courteous-less respondents. I seriously wonder - what's wrong with them. arent we taught to Give and Take??

It really makes me ponder and ponder.

seriously, I'll miss learning everything new and in awe from Brother Kueh, and i will miss Sasquatch friend, who entrusts in me, and our funky themes, and how they have make me a part of everything, and everyone.. haha... but.
I've got more to see. and. I wont stay with you. Even if it takes me to quit. I aint gonna pretend - nothing happened; for I cant.

its MAY now.
too fast.

ay//

It was meant to be emo. LOL.
But they sorta joked bout it turned it around....
But talking to my new friend cheers me up... like, we dont know each other well, and the jokes bout workplace are just so candid and genuine... :)
Temporary escapance.
Great.
when im emo, i answer all the calls... nonstop, and i dont talk much, and i just wanna go home quickly, from work.



and you know, they told me - not to join their clique, because. Because I would die mixing with them, for their lameness.... and they are chinese speaking.
i know, the second point is just a hindrance to me. but.
They are my friends. and im hurt my friends even mentioned that. That they werent Right to mix around with.... and im wondering so hard, why. is there this animosity and doubting between groups of people. complete strangers, who judge based on appreance and presumptions. people they dont even associate with....
im deeply perplexed.

humph.

the ONLY ONE.

Yes, lost the motivation to blog anymore, when no one seems to be reading, and no one seems to know anything anymore. Where the blog once used to be a tool to vent my frustrations and displeasure for others, i might have misused it, but at least that was a platform for met to voice out my opinions... and Blogging used to be therapeutic, when i had no one to speak to and things just aint going the right way.

Once every month, i have come to learn, that I will suffer from the clutches of PMS... I will have my moodswings, my mood will swerve like a roller coaster, and it would plummet 10 000 leagues into silent solitary. I would want to run away from work. run to where my friends are, because my eccentricities will reveal the truth that the current ones ... im losing them because after all, they are just my 4 month acquaintances... and i would suddenly feel so self-conscious and lonely, like I was the Only One around. Maybe, im seriously the only one left behind in reality. Yes, I am slow.

Seriously, If you would slow down to appreciate the trivialities around you, life would be so much more beautiful... Even if it is indeed boring, these trivialities never fail to embellish any dull and monotonous day.
My call centre fellow operator for the night shift penned a poem in the shared notebook, and i adviced him not to be emo.. haha and today he left me a note, and today i helped to pen several stanzas of the poem!!

The days flit by so quickly
Like raindrops falling on my shoulder
They wash away the
Memories of you -
I can remember.

Somehow, im enthralled how the beauty and sheer power of words can connect 2 persons - 2 complete strangers, to forge this one unusual but personal bond, so inconspicuously.

If we take things easily, without qualms, not ponder too deeply into issues, we'd be happier. But sometimes, we ought to reflect.
and I love to reflect by the window, in my room, after dark, with the music playing =)

ay//

SOMETIMES
I seriously get lost in the tracks of time. Since working 6 days a week, days, weekends, have become topsy turvy. I dont know what I'm chasing along, an empty dream. Today is an outing with my colleagues, and danny who has quitted but come to join us. There had been moments of silences, but it was beautiful, and i secretly wished they could appreciate the silence; a moment of reflection. Its wonderful to have friends who would keep talking, from one ridiculous thing to the next senseless issue.. haha:) Then, I wont ever be lonely =) Facebook seems like the platform for me discover - WHATSSSUP! What new people around me are up to. haha.
We ought to slow down our footsteps, to STOP and take a judge on the trivialities in life.

ay//

I committed the stupidest act at work today, one so embarrassing i needed a place to bury my big head.
And that's when, i realised, i might have been too proud, in my own perceptions.
Why were we retaliating someone, together?
That's mean, annayeo.
he said, "dont change the way you treat people"
So i'll Wake Up, and come out of my thwarted perceptions.

Don't, relegate, ay.